In my ten years with Steve, I learned a lot about living a more joyful, well-rounded life.
As part of my grieving process, I identified seven “gifts from Steve”. These are qualities that I always admired about him, and that I incorporated into my life during our love story. I meditate on each one once a week (seven days, seven gifts!), and try to do something specific each day that honors the gift.
On Mondays, I focus on savoring little things.
I’ve always appreciated little things, in the literal sense of the world “little”. I have a shelf my dad built me when I was a baby filled with tiny stone and glass animals, shells, and other adorable knick-knacks. Thanks to Stephen’s amazing thrifting skills, I have a mini skillet, mini waffle maker, mini cooking utensils, and mini mugs so we could make “tiny breakfasts” together.
But Steve savored little things in a different way. He derived great pleasure from the most simple activities. He had a keen eye for finding beauty in the most unlikely places. And he always took the time to slow down and deeply appreciate them.
Here are a few examples of how he would savor little things:
- Tea Ceremony: I’ll never forget the look of bliss on his face as he sipped a warm cup of jasmine tea. He loved performing Chinese tea ceremonies for friends. It is a very slow, meditative and peaceful experience.
- Shinrin-yoku: Also known as “forest bathing”, this is the practice of spending time in the trees to find a state of peaceful well-being. This is not just going for a hike. It’s walking slower than you normally would, touching the bark and leaves on the trees, breathing in the scents of the earth, listening to the wind and the birds, and admiring the way the sun shines through the branches. Thanks to Stephen, I now experience nature in a much deeper way.
- Ikebana: This is the Japanese art of flower arranging. Stephen loved picking flowers from our lush, floral backyard and making arrangements for our dining table. On our travels around the world together, he would often pick me a beautiful flower to put in my hair.
Being in the Present Moment
Savoring little things is a great way to cherish the present moment. By consciously using all five senses to appreciate a small simple moment, you are living life to the fullest.
As Ferris Bueller wisely said, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
Thank you Steve, for your profound ability to savor little things.