Category: Healing Journey
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Now I Lay Me Down to (Not) Sleep
Sleep deprivation = torture. In the early days of grief, I commonly told people that I felt like I was being tortured. And I know that sounds very melodramatic. But truly, given the very minimal sleep I was getting, I don’t think I was exaggerating too much. Everyone’s experience of grief is unique and specific… Read more
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One Day, One Year Later
Today marks the eight year anniversary of my wedding. This is my second anniversary without Stephen. As I reflect back on how I was doing one year ago, I’m astounded by the progress I’ve made. Last year, the days leading up to September 16 were very difficult, with several tear-filled days and restless nights. This… Read more
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Reading the Signs
I’ve been wanting to write this post for awhile… But this particular topic is a challenging one for me. I’ve been struggling to put my thoughts on this into cohesive ideas for over a year! I’m talking about signs, synchronicities, things that could just be coincidences but feel more meaningful than that. Complicated stuff, indeed.… Read more
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You Can’t Take It with You
When a loved one dies, you aren’t just learning how to live without them. You also have to figure out what to do with all their stuff! And that can be a deeply emotional experience. This blog post is a little different than my others, in that it is intended to be very practical and… Read more
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Living A Dream
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” When Steve and I went to Hawaii in 2020, he bought a decal that said “Living The Dream” under a palm tree. But in typical Steve fashion, he modified it to suit his own tastes. (He rarely purchased anything… Read more
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She Chose to Be the Light
“You are what you eat.” We’ve all heard this saying before. But I think it has a meaning that goes far beyond making healthy dietary choices to sustain your body responsibly. We also are what we eat in terms of media. Do you start your morning scrolling through depressing news headlines on your phone, or… Read more
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Is it Okay to Feel Happy?
I’ve been wrestling with what I call “happiness guilt” for months. Last year, I was spending some quality time with one of my friends, and she asked me very sincerely, “Do you ever feel guilty about being happy?” This question might not make sense to people who haven’t experienced losing someone in a tragic, untimely… Read more
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Gifts from Kelvin
People are certainly not the only beings in this world that can teach us things. Animals can be just as inspiring. An influential part of my grieving process when I lost Steve was taking time to reflect and honor the ways in which I grew during our relationship. I thought I’d do the same thing… Read more
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Things I Don’t Miss List
Let’s be honest, everyone can be frustrating sometimes. I wanted to start off this blog by honoring all of my favorite things about Steve. (Please check out my Gifts from Steve posts if you haven’t already.) But let’s get real for a minute. After a few months of intense grieving and dwelling on all the… Read more
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How Am I So Okay?
I’ve been asking myself this a lot lately. I felt a huge shift in my state of being about six months after Steve died. Everyone was telling me it would be a couple years before I felt like myself again, but somehow I returned to my usual joyful self in a mere half-year. I never… Read more